By Joe Navarro with Marvin Karlins
…..Pacifying Behaviors Involving the Neck: Neck touching and/or stroking is one of the most significant and frequent pacifying behaviors we use in responding to stress. I have observed over the decades that there are gender differences in the way men and women use the neck to pacify themselves. Men usually are more robust in their movements, grasping or cupping the front of their neck (under the chin) with their hand or stroking the sides or the back of the neck with their fingers. Sometimes they will adjust their necktie knot or shirt collar. Women do things differently. When they pacify using the neck, they will sometimes touch, twist, or otherwise manipulate necklaces they are wearing. The other major way women neck-pacify is by covering their suprasternal notch with their hand. The suprasternal (which comes from terms meaning “above” and “breastbone”) notch is the hollow area right below the Adam’s apple that is sometimes referred to as the neck dimple. Women touch this part of their neck and/or cover it when they feel stressed; for example, when they feel threatened, uncomfortable, or anxious at the poker table.
This covering of the suprasternal notch is a relatively significant tell. It can be used to detect when a person is bluffing, both in life and in poker. I remember one FBI investigation in which we thought an armed and dangerous fugitive might be hiding out at his mother’s home. Another agent and I went to the woman’s house, and when we knocked at the door, she came outside to meet us. We showed our identification and began asking her a series of questions. When I inquired, “Is your son in the house?” she put her hand to her suprasternal notch and said, “No, he’s not.” I noted her behavior, and we continued with our questioning. After a few minutes I asked, “Is it possible that while you were at work, your son could have sneaked into the house?” Once again, she put her hand up to her neck dimple and replied, “No, I’d know that.” I was now confident that her son was in the house, because the only time she moved her hand to her neck was when I suggested that possibility. To make absolutely sure my assumption was correct, we continued to speak with the woman until, as we prepared to leave, I made one last inquiry: “Just so I can finalize my records, you’re positive he’s not in the house, right?” For a third time, her hand went to her neck as she affirmed her earlier answer. I was now certain the woman was lying. A search of the house turned up her missing son hiding in a bedroom closet.
There’s an interesting footnote to this neck tell. When I was shooting a television special with Annie Duke, I noticed that when something disturbed her, she pacified by covering her suprasternal notch. I said to her, “You really need to watch that neck-touching response, because if I can see it, so can your opponents at the poker table. I suspect you might display that behavior when you’re bluffing, and other players might decipher it and realize you have a weak hand.” After I identified the behavior, she actually recognized she had been touching her neck in such a manner and said she would make an effort to stop. To her credit – she is an incredible person and poker player – I haven’t seen her doing it at the tables since our discussion.
Tells of the Feet: As I emphasize in our book Read ’em and Reap, the feet are the most honest part of our body; thus foot nonverbals normally provide very reliable information. Women don’t…. read rest of article at Bluff Magazine